|
A man came up to a lady in a shopping mall with a
real worried expression.
“Can we speak for a few moments please?” he asked. “Why?” She asked
surprised. “My wife is missing and I know she ‘ll appear from nowhere the
moment she sees me talking to a beautiful woman!”
Good evening friends! Shakespeare has spoken about the 7 stages of man.
Little did he know that centuries down the line there would be a day called
Women’s day! So why not explore our seven stages? Put on your thinking caps,
caps of imagination, creativity and humor, sit back and relax. I know, we
women have a very good sense of humor and can laugh at ourselves. So no
offence meant, keep your mind open & I assure you you’re going to have a
whale of a time!
The seven stages are: Infant, Child, Adolescence, Young lady, Young lady,
Young lady And Young Lady.
Now let us explore each stage!!!
The first stage is that of an Infant. The baby girl, the apple of everyone
at home esp. the father. With dresses galore in the marketplace she gets to
enjoy everyone of them. Backless, sleeveless, off shoulder, smocking, frilly
ones, long or short, SIZE DOES NOT MATTER. The best phase for both the child
& parents.
Next is that of a Child. Carefree, Confident and shy, sweet, lovely to talk
to, she slowly starts to try & understand the world around her. Parents try
speaking in code in front of her & she is smart to understand. Like this
kid. Her parents were busy discussing the previous night’s dinner. Mama
said, “I’m actually impressed with the Mehtas what an educated couple? The
wife has a MA from BU while the husband a PhD from MIT.” Angrily their 5 yr
old drops her fork. “What’s wrong dear?” asks Mama. With a frown the child
replies, “You’re always spelling and I never know what you’re
talking!!!!!!!!!!” A cute innocent phase when every area is questioned &
answers have to be given.
Third the phase of adolescence. Growing up blooming beautifully becoming
aware of herself. Friends play a very important role. This continues till
she is through school & college. Life gives her opportunities to understand
why she is different & what makes her beautiful. As they say, small children
spoil a day’s sleep; big children spoil life’s sleep. This is that phase for
parents. Here, SIZE DOES MATTER. Size of the dress is what I mean.
Next is the young lady, someone for whom everything in life is seen thru a
shade of romance, Life is lovely & so are her dreams. Nothing can stop her
from achieving them; here comes the awareness of the TALL, DARK & HANDSOME
Prince waiting to carry her off in his horse to distant lands where she will
have only happiness. She dreams of sinking into his arms & living happily
ever after.
The next phase is when this young lady decides SHE WILL GROW ONLY YOUNGER
HENCEFORTH.
She decides that her prince should not only be Tall, Dark & Handsome but
also have MONEY. She finds one such but …BUT instead of sinking into his
arms after marriage she ends up with HER ARMS IN THE SINK.
REALITY DAWNS.
Then comes the phase with children. Her first shock in life comes when she
hears ‘AUNTY’ a word used for HER by kids or just about anybody maybe even
5-6years younger AND SOMETIMES OLDER. A shock she cannot accept but is
forced to soon. I remember this lady who got into a crowded bus sometime in
the evening hours. Dressed in a sleeveless blouse she looked easily in her
late forties with lots of grey hair. It was evening time & there were a lot
of school children in too. An 8 year old wanting to excuse herself said,
“SOLPA JAGA BIDU AJJI” & suddenly this lady was furious. She got her energy
from nowhere & said; “YAARE AJJI?” The whole bus fell silent.
I KNEW EXACTLY HOW SHE FELT.
I TOLD YOU WE DON’T LIKE BEING CALLED OLD.
The next phase of this young lady is when children get married.
There was this lady who had got both her son & daughter married around the
same time. Once her friend visited her & asked her how her daughter was .Her
face lit up & she very proudly said. “A successful man is he who can earn
more than his wife can spend & a successful woman who can find such a man.
My daughter has found such a man. I just can’t speak to her, She’s out in
the club on Mondays, Busy in the parlour on Tuesdays, They go out for drives
on Wednesdays, Movies on Thursdays and long drives on Fridays; Saturday &
Sunday out again. They invariably are never home ALWAYS ENJOYING LIFE.”
“Lovely! How is your daughter in law?” “Oh! Don’t ask she is never at home.
I never meet her! Very irresponsible!! Really! She goes to the club on
Monday, every Tuesday I don’t know what she does in the parlour Wednesday is
their day for drives, I don’t understand where they go every week! Thursday
is when they go for movies she can’t waste money like this you see & longer
drives on Friday. Saturdays & Sundays they are never at home. I’m actually
upset with her. I think people are right when they say:
A daughter is a daughter for life, a son, a son till he gets his wife!
The last and final Phase is the most interesting and challenging. The phase
of rediscovery!
Rediscovering the youth in her obviously. Children have gone their way &
grandchildren are finding theirs. Suddenly, grey hair disappears. No, No not
from the scalp they only change colour! They turn black! Smiles look better
than they were all along (let me share the secret, Artificial dentures makes
all the difference!) A phase when time is available aplenty but physically
she can’t cope up with all she wants to do. STILL she tries & determined
that she is, manages to do most of what she wants. After all nature has
ordained her with a great amount of emotional strength. She achieves all her
dreams or at least tries to. Here all she does is only to please HERSELF &
for HER satisfaction. For as they rightly say, AGE IS ALL IN THE MIND.
The different stages of a lady’s requirement of her man is beautifully
summed in this quote:
At 17- all she wants from a man is that he should be- Tall, Dark & Handsome.
At 25- Tall, Dark, Handsome with Money
At 35- Tall, Dark, Handsome with money & brains. (VERY DIFFICULT!)
At 50- A man with hair
At 70- JUST A MAN.
|